Meme-Free Zone

This is a crossover between the Harry Potter books, the Buffy The Vampire Slayer TV series, and the film Bedazzled (1967, not the 2000 remake). Some other crossovers and easter eggs are likely. All characters belong to their respective creators / owners / megacorporations of doom and not to me, please don't sue...



Comments please before I post to archives. For previous parts see:

On Twisting the Hellmouth - https://www.tthfanfic.org/Story-34251/MarcusRowland+Harry+Potter+Undazzled.htm
On Fanfiction.net - https://www.fanfiction.net/s/14336114/1/Harry-Potter-Undazzled
On Archive of Our Own - https://archiveofourown.org/works/54407350

This is a crossover between the Harry Potter books, the Buffy The Vampire Slayer TV series, and the film Bedazzled (1967, not the 2000 remake). Some other crossovers and easter eggs are likely. All characters belong to their respective creators / owners / megacorporations of doom and not to me, please don't sue...



Now posted to archives with some minor changes;

On Twisting the Hellmouth - https://www.tthfanfic.org/Story-34251/MarcusRowland+Harry+Potter+Undazzled.htm
On Fanfiction.net - https://www.fanfiction.net/s/14336114/1/Harry-Potter-Undazzled
On Archive of Our Own - https://archiveofourown.org/works/54407350

 I've seen quite a few stories which suggest that Harry Potter could have frozen to death after being left on the Dursley doorstep. This always seemed a bit unlikely to me, since Britain rarely has sub-zero temperatures at the beginning of November - nights at that time of year are usually pretty mild.

So I finally got round to asking the Meteorological Office, who sent me some data, and it turns out that night temperatures on the 1st, 2nd, and 3rd of November 1981 were all above freezing in Bracknell (Berkshire) which was apparently the nearest recording point. Surrey is further south so I'd expect it to be slightly warmer there if not the same. London weather seems to have been much the same but I don't have the same level of detail.

Date	Daily Maximum Temperature (0900-0900) (°C)	Daily Minimum Temperature (0900-0900) (°C)	Maximum Night Temperature (2100-0900) (°C)	Minimum Night Temperature (2100-0900) (°C)
01/11/1981	15.8	3.9	14.0	7.0
02/11/1981	15.5	13.3	13.9	13.3
03/11/1981	13.6	12.0	12.9	12.0
04/11/1981	10.5	7.9	12.6	7.9
05/11/1981	9.8	-1.5	2.5	-1.5
06/11/1981	8.1	-3.3	-0.9	-3.3
07/11/1981	7.7	-2.1	1.3	-2.1
08/11/1981	7.8	0.6	5.2	0.9
09/11/1981	8.5	-1.5	2.3	0.5
10/11/1981	8.6	-2.5	4.1	-2.5

So the night of the first was fairly mild - there were no sub-zero night temperatures until the 5th. I don't know enough about babies to say how temperatures of 7-14 degrees would affect one, except to think that they're probably less than ideal, but I get the impression we're talking exposure-related illness rather than literally freezing to death.

I pass this on in case anyone finds it useful.

Continuing my Harry Potter / DC crossover, previous parts on any of these archives:

On Fanfiction.net
On Archive of Our Own
On Twisting the Hellmouth

( Chapter XXXI: We Can Rule You Wholesale )



Comments please before I post to archives!

Now archived with a few small changes

I did think of using this in Half God Prince but it's a bit too silly, and made Sybill Trelawney a bit too old for the purposes of my story. Anyone who wants to do something with the idea is welcome to it.

In the early 1970s Sybill Trelawney foresaw the rise of Voldemort and decided to hide out in the muggle world to avoid the violence, using a fictitious surname and spelling her first name the muggle way, with only one L. Since she didn't fancy the idea of working for a living she looked around for a wealthy bachelor and settled on Basil Fawlty, a hotelier with no close relatives, using a combination of potions and mind control spells to engineer a marriage.

Unfortunately Fawlty was mentally unstable and the magic only made things worse, turning a slightly irritable man into a compulsive liar with a hair-trigger temper and violent mood swings. The hotel began to lose customers and money, and was soon heavily mortgaged.

Eventually Sybill decided to cut her losses and go back to the magical world. One of her contacts told her about a teaching post at Hogwarts, and she got the job (whether the prediction that impressed Dumbledore was fake or real is open to question) and stayed on in the magical world for the next twenty years.

Since she vanished without warning and left no forwarding address Basil is widely suspected of having murdered her, though there isn't much evidence. With Stybill no longer potioning him his mental state has gradually improved, and the hotel has begun to make a profit again - although it's never explicitly mentioned, some of the guests are amateur sleuths looking for clues to the alleged murder!

After the second fall of Voldemort Sybill hears that the hotel is making a profit again, and decides to step back in as Basil's estranged wife, and demand her share. But naturally things will go horribly wrong for all concerned...

Continuing my Harry Potter / DC crossover, previous parts on any of these archives:

On Fanfiction.net
On Archive of Our Own
On Twisting the Hellmouth


( XXIX: Conversations with Dead People )

I think this is the longest chapter so far, many apologies that it's taken me so long to update. Comments please before I post to archives!

Revised slightly - Sunday evening.

Continuing my Harry Potter / DC crossover, previous parts on any of these archives:

On Fanfiction.net
On Archive of Our Own
On Twisting the Hellmouth

( XXVII: Call Charges )


Comments please before I post to archives

Continuing my Harry Potter / DC crossover, previous parts on any of these archives:

On Fanfiction.net
On Archive of Our Own
On Twisting the Hellmouth

( XXV: Riotous Assemblies )

I think this is the longest chapter so far, about 4.4 thousand words plus end notes, so there are probably typos etc. Comments please before I post to archives.

Continuing my Harry Potter / DC crossover, previous parts on any of these archives:

On Fanfiction.net
On Archive of Our Own
On Twisting the Hellmouth

( XXIV: Truces and Treaties  )

Comments please before I post to archives.

Continuing my Harry Potter / DC crossover, previous parts on any of these archives:

On Fanfiction.net
On Archive of Our Own
On Twisting the Hellmouth

( XXIII: 70% Cocoa Solids )

Comments please before I post to archives. Apologies for another hiatus.